Some of our clients can rattle off sports statistics going back decades. Others can recite train schedules with astonishing accuracy. And someone very special to me can identify virtually every dog breed – including mixed breeds – while also remembering the dog’s name, where they met it, and when – even years later.
For many autistic individuals, these talents are not simply hobbies or favorite pastimes. They’re affinities – deep, focused interests that bring joy, purpose, regulation and a way to connect with the world.
Autistic people often navigate a world that can feel sensory-intensive, unpredictable, and full of confusing and unwritten social rules. Affinities offer something different: patterns, structure, consistency, and a space where expertise can flourish. Whether it’s dogs, weather systems, transit maps, dinosaurs, sports analytics, or animation, these interests create opportunities for learning, mastery, and self-expression.
Too often, conversations about autism focus primarily on deficits or challenges with communication, executive functioning, social interaction, or adaptive skills. Affinities remind us to look beyond deficits and recognize the incredible strengths, memory, attention to detail, and depth of knowledge that many autistic people possess.
One of the most persistent myths about autism is that autistic people are not interested in relationships. In reality, many deeply value connection but may communicate, socialize, or build relationships differently than neurotypical peers. Sometimes the most effective pathway to engagement isn’t small talk—it’s an affinity.
What can you learn when you choose to value a person’s affinity? Let’s use my dog lover as an example. You can ask him questions to connect:
- “What do you enjoy most about dogs?”
- “How did you become interested in different dog breeds?”
- “What is the rarest dog breed you have ever seen?”
Better yet, invite them to be the expert:
- You know so much about this – tell me more.
- What is something most people don’t know about dogs?
- “Where should I go if I want to see a lot of different breeds? ”
When we dive into someone’s affinity with them, we’re doing more than engaging them in conversation. We’re validating an important part of their identity, creating opportunities for real connection, and building relationships through shared interests instead of social demands.
On the flip side, dismissing a special interest as an unwanted “restricted interest” can quickly shut down a chance to connect. Comments like are you “You’re still into that?” or “Can you talk about something else?” may seem harmless, but can be insulting as this topic means so much to the devoted speaker.
If you have a dog enthusiast in your life, you’re probably nodding along right now. That’s why I am excited to share some of our favorite dog-centered events in the Chicagoland area, along with a few new discoveries. We hope you enjoy the connections you will make – both human and canine!
Events around Chicagoland this Summer
- Puppy Beauty Pageant (Under Food Fest heading) https://newlenox.net/400/Food-Fight-Taco-Fest
- Barkapalooza https://www.wshs-dg.org/news-events/upcoming-events/215-barkapalooza-2021-save-the-date-1-1-1-1-1
- Dog Days of Summer https://yorktowncenter.com/events/dog-days-of-summer/
- Tails on the Trails at Morton Arboretum https://mortonarb.org/explore/activities/events/tails-on-the-trails/
- Paws in the Park at Cantigny Park https://cantigny.org/event/paws-in-the-park-day-24-2-2-2/2026-04-06/
- Paws Chicago Events https://www.pawschicago.org/events-dog-training/fundraising-events/5k-walk/run
All of these dog visits might lead to a new member of the family, in which case, please review:
Social Stories
- Getting a New Dog https://www.autismsociety-nc.org/wp-content/uploads/New-pet-1.pdf
— KC